I am lucky.

Tessa is 2 weeks old today. She is such a joy in our lives! Every other night seems to be a challenge but oddly enough I don't mind missing out on sleep to take care of my daughter. She is starting to smile at us and "talk". We got the go ahead to let her sleep as long as she likes at night and Bryce and I both could not be happier to not have to set our alarm to wake us up every 3 hours to feed her. =) Jace is a great big brother. He loves his sister and gets so excited each time he gets to help feeding her or holding her. He hasn't learned just yet that he has to use an inside voice now but I know he'll get it soon.

After I had Jace I didn't have an issue right away with how my body looked. I had more weight around my hips, stretch marks on my belly, and I wasn't the skinniest thing around my belly. It never bothered me that I didn't have the perfect body anymore or that I would never wear a bikini again. For some reason I've been having a hard time with my body image since having Tessa. I hate that my belly is bigger than I want. I still have stretch marks. I'm even counting down the days until I can start working out. (28 days!!) Tonight I was Pinterest looking at postpartum tips and tricks of every kind. I came across this picture of a women's belly. It was full of stretch marks and beside it wrote, "For every woman unhappy with her postpartum marks, is another who wishes she had them." This got me thinking. I am lucky to have been given the chance to grow two children inside me. I am lucky that I have these marks because it means my body grew and stretched to great lengths to give my babies a home until they were ready to meet this world. I struggled with postpartum anxiety and depression after having Jace and I worry that I'll struggle with it again this time around. I need to keep reminding myself that I am lucky. There are so many women out there who would make amazing mothers but for some reason God has not gifted them the opportunity to bare child. I am lucky I was given the chance to carrying my two babies. Yes, my body may not be the most pleasing to the eyes but it was my children's home and those marks are a reminder to me that I'm lucky.